I spent weeks hearing your specific ringtone that you asked for, and thinking to myself, or saying out loud, "why the fuck are you talking to me?"
I became bitter at you for expecting more than you'd ever promised me.
and I met someone new, someone different, someone... here. And I let them know me in the way only you knew me. They dug deeper, they got to know me more than you ever bothered to get to know me.
And although I'd still answer you, I began to truly withdraw. Unconsciously. When you noticed, when it broke you down, you threatened to leave me, and I panicked.
See, as much of a burden as you were, as bitter as I am, I still want you around. I don't want to break off our friendship, even if we stop sleeping together when we see each other.
When you threatened to leave and I panicked, I watched you spiral down. A friendly out, what you that I wanted, to hurtful words, a true break up, to an I love you.
It hurt me to see you fall because, us or not, I still care about you. You are still important in my life. You're still truly a friend. Seeing you fall, hurts.
But I can't save you. I can't fix you. I'm not an angel, I've got my own broken burdens to overcome. I feel it's really unfair of you to ask me for that.
I spent weeks hearing your specific ringtone that you asked for, and thinking to myself, or saying out loud, "why the fuck are you talking to me?"
ReplyDeleteI became bitter at you for expecting more than you'd ever promised me.
and I met someone new, someone different, someone... here. And I let them know me in the way only you knew me. They dug deeper, they got to know me more than you ever bothered to get to know me.
And although I'd still answer you, I began to truly withdraw. Unconsciously. When you noticed, when it broke you down, you threatened to leave me, and I panicked.
See, as much of a burden as you were, as bitter as I am, I still want you around. I don't want to break off our friendship, even if we stop sleeping together when we see each other.
When you threatened to leave and I panicked, I watched you spiral down. A friendly out, what you that I wanted, to hurtful words, a true break up, to an I love you.
It hurt me to see you fall because, us or not, I still care about you. You are still important in my life. You're still truly a friend. Seeing you fall, hurts.
But I can't save you. I can't fix you. I'm not an angel, I've got my own broken burdens to overcome. I feel it's really unfair of you to ask me for that.