IDK WHY THE FUCK BLOGGER IS DOING THIS TO ME... but this is the post:
A friend is there to forgive your faults. A friend knows you're not perfect. A friend accepts your flaws and loves you for them, and for your valiant traits. A friend should never make you question the validity of yourself. A friend never makes you feel as if your troubles are minute, even if theirs are relatively more troubling. A friend is there to tell you how not pathetic you are those nights that you've had one too many tears roll down your face about a boy you'll forget about in a matter of months. A friend is there to tell you in the most loving way possible, "You're being an idiot," but not every time you're being an idiot. Just the times when you absolutely need to be told. Most of all, a friend is someone who knows that the strength of your relationship is strong enough to take care of it's self during a few weeks of separation. Life gets busy, life gets hectic and as you get older, spending time with friends becomes less and less of a daily routine and more of a when-schedules-jive, rare occurrence. A friend should never ask you to sacrifice important parts of your life (i.e. school, work, other friends) just for them. All a friend should ask in return is that you forgive their flaws equally. That you understand their problems and they can lean on you as much as you lean on them. A friend should never ask you to be more than who you are.
That isn't to say that being a lazy friend is excusable. Calling upon a friend only in your time of need makes you selfish, and kind of a shithead. All relationships, romantic and platonic, take effort from both sides. And for the vast majority of my close relationships, even the one with Keber, I'm not putting in all the effort.
But I guess with some people, and never 100% of the time, but maybe 10-30%, I feel like I'm being asked to be perfect. Or to be more than I am. Like someone who has no right to do anything other than encourage me and support me, is demanding something better or different from me. And it's degrading, it's hurtful, and I want it to stop. I don't want someone I care about immensely to make me, even if it's unintentional, question the validity of myself. It hurts, more than anything, and causes nothing but damage and negative feelings. And at a time when both of our lives are doing their damnedest to push us away as much as possible, this negativity does nothing but fuel the flame that could end a friendship that shouldn't end.
I can't feel any longer like I'm the only one of two people involved in this relationship struggling to make it survive. Yes, our lives our crazy. We both have our problems. We may not talk every day or even every week, but shouldn't I feel that after a couple weeks I'll be welcome into the just as loving arms of a friend without having to apologize for the fact that I'm simply just going through life??
IDK WHY THE FUCK BLOGGER IS DOING THIS TO ME... but this is the post:
ReplyDeleteA friend is there to forgive your faults. A friend knows you're not perfect. A friend accepts your flaws and loves you for them, and for your valiant traits.
A friend should never make you question the validity of yourself. A friend never makes you feel as if your troubles are minute, even if theirs are relatively more troubling.
A friend is there to tell you how not pathetic you are those nights that you've had one too many tears roll down your face about a boy you'll forget about in a matter of months.
A friend is there to tell you in the most loving way possible, "You're being an idiot," but not every time you're being an idiot. Just the times when you absolutely need to be told.
Most of all, a friend is someone who knows that the strength of your relationship is strong enough to take care of it's self during a few weeks of separation. Life gets busy, life gets hectic and as you get older, spending time with friends becomes less and less of a daily routine and more of a when-schedules-jive, rare occurrence. A friend should never ask you to sacrifice important parts of your life (i.e. school, work, other friends) just for them.
All a friend should ask in return is that you forgive their flaws equally. That you understand their problems and they can lean on you as much as you lean on them. A friend should never ask you to be more than who you are.
That isn't to say that being a lazy friend is excusable. Calling upon a friend only in your time of need makes you selfish, and kind of a shithead.
All relationships, romantic and platonic, take effort from both sides. And for the vast majority of my close relationships, even the one with Keber, I'm not putting in all the effort.
But I guess with some people, and never 100% of the time, but maybe 10-30%, I feel like I'm being asked to be perfect. Or to be more than I am. Like someone who has no right to do anything other than encourage me and support me, is demanding something better or different from me. And it's degrading, it's hurtful, and I want it to stop. I don't want someone I care about immensely to make me, even if it's unintentional, question the validity of myself. It hurts, more than anything, and causes nothing but damage and negative feelings. And at a time when both of our lives are doing their damnedest to push us away as much as possible, this negativity does nothing but fuel the flame that could end a friendship that shouldn't end.
I can't feel any longer like I'm the only one of two people involved in this relationship struggling to make it survive. Yes, our lives our crazy. We both have our problems. We may not talk every day or even every week, but shouldn't I feel that after a couple weeks I'll be welcome into the just as loving arms of a friend without having to apologize for the fact that I'm simply just going through life??