False Love and Affection, Pt 2 (You don't want me)

Whatever it is, it's a PART of me. I know it is. I feel like I've known it before.
It's belonged to me before.
Right now I can focus on it. Right now I feel this close to knowing what it is.
But whatever it is is covered up by this undying fear
of being loved, of learning to love again,
of learning to have feelings for someone again.
It's so much easier to just be a "dirty whore." I guess.
But that's not who I am! That's not what I want!
And now that I'm this close to being put in a situation
where I have to work past that fear
I can feel the fear trying to win, and hiding the part of me that knows how to
live life and love freely.
The part of me you WRECKED. the part of me that was LOST.
the part of me you DESTROYED.
I have it. It's mine and I can FIX IT.
And I know that makes me happy but I'm sorry,
because I've finally broken that piece of information,
finally identified a part of what it was,
and knowing that I was truly that broken...
It only makes me cry a little bit.
What this is...
It's what I thought I had lost when I lost you...
A part of me that you can't keep anymore.
A part of me that has always belonged to me.
And I know what it is now.
I'm going to learn to know it.